Mitch Albom's international bestseller "Tuesdays with Morrie" is a must-read book for anyone interested in life's lessons. I bought my copy right after New Year 2001 as I contemplated early retirement after 27 years of employment. My actual early retirement came a year later. By that time, I felt psychologically prepared just to fade away and sail into the sunset. Later events, however, proved that that was not yet meant to be. But then, that's another story altogether. Meantime, enjoy the following passages, attributed by the author to Morrie Schwartz, which I liked in this book:
On Culture:
"The culture we have does not make people feel good about themselves. And you have to be strong enough to say if the culture doesn't work, don't buy it." (p.42)
* * *
"People are only mean when they're threatened, and that's what our culture does...And when you get threatened, you start looking out only for yourself. You start making money a god. It is all part of this culture." (p.42)
On Tension of Opposites:
"Life is a series of pulls back and forth. You want to do one thing, but you are bound to do something else." (p.40)
* * *
"A tension of opposites, like a pull on a rubber band. And most of us live somewhere in the middle." (p.40)
On Love:
"Love wins. Love always wins." (p.40)
* * *
"Love each other or die." (p.163)
On Forgiveness:
"Forgive yourself before you die. Then forgive others." (p.164)
* * *
"We...need to forgive ourselves...For all the things we didn't do. All the things we should have done. You can't get stuck on the regrets of what should have happened." (p.166)
On Getting Meaning into Life:
"So many people walk around with a meaningless life. They seem half-asleep, even when they're busy doing things they think are important. This is because they're chasing the wrong things. The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning." (p.43)
On Most Important Thing in Life:
"The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love, and to let it come in." (p.52)
On Trust:
"...if you are ever going to have other people trust you, you must feel that you can trust them, too--even when you're in the dark." (p.61)
On Friendship:
"...we've had thirty-five years of friendship. You don't need speech or hearing to feel that." (p.71)
On Death and Ambition:
"...the truth is...if you accept that you can die at any time--then you might not be as ambitious as you are." (p.83)
On Family:
"The fact is, there is no foundation, no secure ground, upon which people may stand today if it isn't the family." (p.91)
* * *
"If you don't have the support and love and caring and concern that you get from a family, you don't have much at all. Love is so supremely important." (p.91)
On Having Children:
"There is no experience like having children...If you want the experience of having complete responsibility for another human being, and to learn to love and bond in the deepest way, then you should have children." (p.93)
On Material Things:
"Don't cling to things, because everything is impermanent." (p.103)
* * *
"You can't substitute material things for love or for gentleness or for tenderness or for a sense of comradeship." (p.125)
On Emotions:
"If you hold back on the emotions--if you don't allow yourself to go all the way through them--you can never get to being detached, you're too busy being afraid." (p.104)
On Dying and Living:
"When you learn how to die, you learn how to live." (p.104)
* * *
"Don't let go too soon but, but don't hang on too long." (p.162)
On Being a Child:
"We all know how to be a child. It's inside all of us. For me, it's just remembering how to enjoy it." (p.116)
On Youth:
"...I know what a misery being young can be, so don't tell me it's so great." (p.117)
* * *
"...in addition to all the miseries, the young are not wise. They have very little understanding about life." (p.118)
On Aging:
"Aging is ot just decay...It's growth." (p.118)
* * *
"If you're always battling against getting older, you're always going to be unhappy, because it will happen anyhow." (p.118,119)
* * *
"You have to find what's good and true and beautiful in your life as it is now. Looking back makes you competitive. And, age is not a competitive issue." (p.120)
* * *
"How can I be envious of where you are--when I've been there myself." (p.121)
On Money and Power:
"Money is not a substitute for tenderness, and power is not a substitute for tenderness." (p.125)
On Status and Showing Off:
"...if you're trying to show off for people at the top, forget it. They will look down on you anyhow. And if you're trying to show off for people at the bottom, forget it. They will only envy you. Status will get you nowhere. Only an open heart will allow you to float equally between everyone." (p.127)
On Immortality:
"...love is how you stay alive, even after you are gone." (p.133)
On Marriage:
"I've learned this much about marriage. You get tested. You find out who you are, who the other person is, and how you accommodate or don't." (p.149)
* * *
"...there are a few rules I know to be true about love and marriage: If you don't respect the other person, you're gonna have a lot of trouble. If you don't know how to compromise, you're gonna have a lot of trouble. If you can't talk openly about what goes on between you, you're gonna have a lot of trouble. And if you don't have a common set of values in life, you're gonna have a lot of trouble. Your values must be alike." (p.149)
* * *
"I think marriage is a very important thing to do, and you're missing a hell of a lot if you don't try it." (p.149)
On Shortsightedness:
"...no matter where you live, the biggest defect we human beings have is our shortsightedness. We don't see what we could be. We should be looking at our potential, stretching ourselves into everything we can be come." (p.156)
On Needing Others:
"In the beginning of life, when we were infants, we need others to survive, right? And at the end of life, when you get like me, you need others to survive, right? But here's the secret: in between, we need others as well." (p.157)
On Being Number Two:
"What's wrong with being number two?" (p.159)
On the Important Questions:
"As I see it, they have to do with love, responsibility, spirituality, awareness." (p.175)
On Death :
"Death ends a life, not a relationship." (p.174)
On Relationships:
"There is no formula to relationships. They have to be negotiated in loving ways, with room for both parties, what they want and what they need, what they can do and what their life is like." (p.177,178)
-Mitch Albom
On Culture:
"The culture we have does not make people feel good about themselves. And you have to be strong enough to say if the culture doesn't work, don't buy it." (p.42)
* * *
"People are only mean when they're threatened, and that's what our culture does...And when you get threatened, you start looking out only for yourself. You start making money a god. It is all part of this culture." (p.42)
On Tension of Opposites:
"Life is a series of pulls back and forth. You want to do one thing, but you are bound to do something else." (p.40)
* * *
"A tension of opposites, like a pull on a rubber band. And most of us live somewhere in the middle." (p.40)
On Love:
"Love wins. Love always wins." (p.40)
* * *
"Love each other or die." (p.163)
On Forgiveness:
"Forgive yourself before you die. Then forgive others." (p.164)
* * *
"We...need to forgive ourselves...For all the things we didn't do. All the things we should have done. You can't get stuck on the regrets of what should have happened." (p.166)
On Getting Meaning into Life:
"So many people walk around with a meaningless life. They seem half-asleep, even when they're busy doing things they think are important. This is because they're chasing the wrong things. The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning." (p.43)
On Most Important Thing in Life:
"The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love, and to let it come in." (p.52)
On Trust:
"...if you are ever going to have other people trust you, you must feel that you can trust them, too--even when you're in the dark." (p.61)
On Friendship:
"...we've had thirty-five years of friendship. You don't need speech or hearing to feel that." (p.71)
On Death and Ambition:
"...the truth is...if you accept that you can die at any time--then you might not be as ambitious as you are." (p.83)
On Family:
"The fact is, there is no foundation, no secure ground, upon which people may stand today if it isn't the family." (p.91)
* * *
"If you don't have the support and love and caring and concern that you get from a family, you don't have much at all. Love is so supremely important." (p.91)
On Having Children:
"There is no experience like having children...If you want the experience of having complete responsibility for another human being, and to learn to love and bond in the deepest way, then you should have children." (p.93)
On Material Things:
"Don't cling to things, because everything is impermanent." (p.103)
* * *
"You can't substitute material things for love or for gentleness or for tenderness or for a sense of comradeship." (p.125)
On Emotions:
"If you hold back on the emotions--if you don't allow yourself to go all the way through them--you can never get to being detached, you're too busy being afraid." (p.104)
On Dying and Living:
"When you learn how to die, you learn how to live." (p.104)
* * *
"Don't let go too soon but, but don't hang on too long." (p.162)
On Being a Child:
"We all know how to be a child. It's inside all of us. For me, it's just remembering how to enjoy it." (p.116)
On Youth:
"...I know what a misery being young can be, so don't tell me it's so great." (p.117)
* * *
"...in addition to all the miseries, the young are not wise. They have very little understanding about life." (p.118)
On Aging:
"Aging is ot just decay...It's growth." (p.118)
* * *
"If you're always battling against getting older, you're always going to be unhappy, because it will happen anyhow." (p.118,119)
* * *
"You have to find what's good and true and beautiful in your life as it is now. Looking back makes you competitive. And, age is not a competitive issue." (p.120)
* * *
"How can I be envious of where you are--when I've been there myself." (p.121)
On Money and Power:
"Money is not a substitute for tenderness, and power is not a substitute for tenderness." (p.125)
On Status and Showing Off:
"...if you're trying to show off for people at the top, forget it. They will look down on you anyhow. And if you're trying to show off for people at the bottom, forget it. They will only envy you. Status will get you nowhere. Only an open heart will allow you to float equally between everyone." (p.127)
On Immortality:
"...love is how you stay alive, even after you are gone." (p.133)
On Marriage:
"I've learned this much about marriage. You get tested. You find out who you are, who the other person is, and how you accommodate or don't." (p.149)
* * *
"...there are a few rules I know to be true about love and marriage: If you don't respect the other person, you're gonna have a lot of trouble. If you don't know how to compromise, you're gonna have a lot of trouble. If you can't talk openly about what goes on between you, you're gonna have a lot of trouble. And if you don't have a common set of values in life, you're gonna have a lot of trouble. Your values must be alike." (p.149)
* * *
"I think marriage is a very important thing to do, and you're missing a hell of a lot if you don't try it." (p.149)
On Shortsightedness:
"...no matter where you live, the biggest defect we human beings have is our shortsightedness. We don't see what we could be. We should be looking at our potential, stretching ourselves into everything we can be come." (p.156)
On Needing Others:
"In the beginning of life, when we were infants, we need others to survive, right? And at the end of life, when you get like me, you need others to survive, right? But here's the secret: in between, we need others as well." (p.157)
On Being Number Two:
"What's wrong with being number two?" (p.159)
On the Important Questions:
"As I see it, they have to do with love, responsibility, spirituality, awareness." (p.175)
On Death :
"Death ends a life, not a relationship." (p.174)
On Relationships:
"There is no formula to relationships. They have to be negotiated in loving ways, with room for both parties, what they want and what they need, what they can do and what their life is like." (p.177,178)
-Mitch Albom
