I'd like to share with you excerpts from a blog wittily written by George Moneo in www.babalublog.com, entitled "The International Rules of Manhood". Here are the rules of manhood that put a smile on my face:
1: Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.(The royalty-free photo shown above courtesy of www.sxc.hu) Print
2: It is OK for a man to cry ONLY under the following circumstances:
(a) When a heroic dog dies to save its master.
(b) The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her blouse.
(c) After wrecking your boss' car.
(d) One hour, 12 minutes, 37 seconds into "The Crying Game".
(e) When she is using her teeth.
Rule 3: Any Man who brings a camera to a bachelor party may be legally killed and eaten by his buddies.
Rule 5: If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever unless you actually marry her.
Rule 7: No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. In fact, even remembering your buddy's birthday is strictly optional. At that point, you must celebrate at a strip bar of the birthday boy's choice.
Rule 10: You may flatulate in front of a woman only after you have brought her to climax. If you trap her head under the covers for the purpose of flatulent entertainment, she's officially your girlfriend.
Rule 16: Women who claim they "love to watch sports" must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to drink as much as the other sports watchers.
Rule 19: If you compliment a guy on his six-pack, you'd better be talking about his choice of beer.
Rule 21: Phrases that may NOT be uttered to another man while lifting weights:
(a) Yeah, Baby, Push it!
(b) C'mon, give me one more! Harder!
(c) Another set and we can hit the showers!
Rule 22: Never talk to a man in a bathroom unless you are on equal footing: i.e., both urinating, both waiting in line, etc. For all other situations, an almost imperceptible nod is all the conversation you need.
Rule 28: There is no reason for guys to watch Ice Skating or Men's Gymnastics. Ever.
No comments:
Post a Comment